JOKER'S CORNER

[rosesweethart]

its from reader's digest funny page:

Irresistible Irony

About a year had passed since my amicable divorce, and I decided it was time to start dating again. Unsure how to begin, I thought I’d scan the personals column of my local newspaper. I came across three men who seemed like they’d be promising candidates. A couple of days later, I was checking my messages and discovered one from my ex-husband. “I was over visiting the kids yesterday,” he said. “While I was there I happened to notice you had circled some ads in the paper. Don’t bother calling the guy in the second column. I can tell you right now it won’t work out. That guy is me.”

[rosesweethart]

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned,” he says. "I’ve spent the week with seven beautiful women.”

"Do not fret, my son,” says the priest. "All you need to do is take seven lemons, squeeze the juice into a glass, and drink the juice.”

"Will that cleanse my sin from me?”

"No, but it’ll wipe that stupid smile off your face.

[Edwin]

Rosesweethart, it sounds like that guy had a wonderful time with those 7 beautiful women, and the Father could not stand his smiling! Thanks for your very humorous posts here, Rosesweethart!

[Edwin]

There is also a statement, and I don't know where it came from that says, "Blonds have more fun!" So based on that all the young ladies were dying their hair blond. Then people see a lady who has colored hair, but blond roots, and they say she is a natural blond! I think blonds are more prevailent in some countries of the world, like the Scandavian countries. But, I think there are thousands of blond jokes! It is interesting that my hair was blond, almost white, when I was born until I was a few years old, and it got darker and darker, until it was so dark brown that it looked black! My parents wanted me to be a girl, so I have a picture of me when I was little with long blond hair ringlets and a girl's dress! It is a wonder that I don't have a gender identity crisis, but I am all guy/male, masculine!

[Edwin]

I know there is nothing funny about Alzhiemer's disease because of what it does to people. Sometimes we find humor and laugh at and about things that are not even fun as what some call comic relief. We laugh, but it isn't funny. My mother's older sister years ago got Alzhiemer's disease. She was a very capable person in her life, raising a large family and operating a restaurant for many years, but when the disease took her, she got so she couldn't remember who she was or who anyone else was. Her kids were telling about how bad she was getting, and said she was getting down on the floor and scratching the rug! Her younger brother, and my mother's younger brother, just younger than she was said, "Well, maybe the rug itched! He had a quite a sense of humor that didn't set well with everyone. When i was little he passed a platter of chicken to me, and told me, "Have some dead chicken!" I never thought of it that way; I just considered it chicken meat or food! He told my uncle a fib about his horse just to be funny he told him that his horse was sick and couldn't get up. My uncle drove for almost 2 hours from his place, the same valley in which we were living at the time, went out and looked at his horse standing with all the other horses, and you know, I don't think he was even mad about that; he just took the joke good naturedly. My uncle gave my brother in law directions that was supposed to help him get to my brother's and his wife's brother's place, but instead that put him up on top of a mountain on a very bad road. My uncle thought it was funnier than my brother in law, who was very angry about that joke! My brother in law had a beautiful black with red interior 1958 Chevy Impala, and it wasn't a nice joke, and I suppose my uncle repented of that joke, no doubt because he became a Christian in his later years. He was a rodeoing cowboy as well as a large ranch and farm operator, and he got started going to these cowboy church meeting, and became a Christian. I never thought he would ever become a Christian because he talked worse than anyone I have ever heard, but the Lord cleaned up his language also. He died as a result of a horse accident when he was team roping when he was I think 84 years old, or something like that. Some said that he shouldn't have been rodeoing as old as he was, but then someone else said that he died happy doing what he loved to do.

[mystic]

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[Edwin]

Your joke here mystic makes me think about clothing styles and the way they change over the years. To look at the clothing that people wore before the turn of the 20th century, it would make you wonder how they could do anything in those clothes, but they had to work harder than we do! One of the extra information behind the making of a movie, I think it was "Billy Graham," they talked about how the neck ties were narrow at one point and then a few years later people were wearing wide neck ties. The changing styles of the shoes is another factor in the movies, and if these things are not correct then the authentic feeling for the time period doesn't work. There are so many things to think about in keeping everything authentic in a movie from making sure there are no modern watches to making sure the hair styles are correct. I can see the same thing in dress codes/styles that were acceptable in the churches over the years. When we were young if ladies as part of the ministry, like the wife of a minister wore jewelry, wore lipstick, makeup, short hair, pants, and other things they would probably be dismissed, and would certainly lack respect. When I was pastoring churches as a young man, every minister wore a suit, or at least some very dressy, formal clothing including a nice shirt and neck tie, always. Now, they still come into the pulpit with nice slacks on, but usually open shirt and no tie, and at one time that would have been unacceptable. When we were young Carol had no objections to wearing dresses. She was often times back then the Sunday School superintendent. She was expected to wear a nice dress. One pastor told her that he did not want to see her on the platform with pants on rather than a dress. Now many of the ladies get up on the platform to sing or minister with pants on rather than a dress. Carol anymore does not like to wear dresses, so I can't even remember now the last time I saw her wear a dress! They say that if something is out of style, just wait a few years and it will come back in!

[mystic]

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[Edwin]

This guy came home from church one morning with 2 black eyes. His friend ask him what happened to him. He said, well, I was sitting behind this heavy lady, and when they stood up her dress stuck in her butt crack, so I pulled it out! So she punched me! The friend said well, that accounts for one black eye, but what happened that you got the other back eye? He said, "She was so unhappy that I pulled it out, that I thought I should put it back!"

[mystic]

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