crisipicada wrote:it is hard to know if the other is serious or not. Because this is online dating and who knows, people are trying to treat someone like a thing "collect & sellect". I am human being so i have feelings, if the person doing collecting and selecting, that is really a red flag on me. NOT interested anymore.
At which point do you expect the man to stop "collecting and selecting'? Do you expect the man to contact one person, then wait to see how that goes and if it does not work out, to contact the next person?
I have always operated, in the past, that I would contact many different ladies and keep it casual for a while with them all. If one started to become promising, then i would suggest asking her to become "exclusive". If she agrees, then I would write the other ladies and inform them of my decision and wish them the best.
I do not think you should have more than one serious girl but until you have at least one, I do not see a problem with talking to many. With as many as I have talked to that simply would never work, I cannot imagine how long it would have been if I had to go through 20 or 30 people one at a time, writing... waiting for a response... until you knew she was not the one, then beginning again with another.
So I guess my position is, it depends on what you mean by collect and select... It sounds like what I do, so I guess that would eliminate me
But to do otherwise could potentially take forever. Also, i do not let the conversations get more intimate or deep until I would "select" someone, at least in theory.
Bill