JOKER'S CORNER

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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby Smiley » Tue Oct 09, 2012 6:22 pm

Once upon a time a prince asked a beautiful princess to marry him.

She said NO!

So the prince got to keep his old jeans,and his stereo and record collection,and he rode motorcycles and went fishing whenever he wanted and went to concerts and had girlfriends half his age and drank milk out of the carton and left the seat up and had lots of money and came home drunk without getting yelled at and all his friends wished they could be him.
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby wayne208 » Thu Oct 11, 2012 10:56 pm

2 blond ladies were walking just outside of a Small Town .. One looked down and Said "Look deer Tracks "" The other Blond said " No they are bear Tracks " ,,
They were found dead an Hour later hit by a Train :) :) :) Get it they were Train Tracks :D :D
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby Edwin » Mon Oct 15, 2012 9:36 pm

I hope no one is offended at this, but it really happened. Years ago mass hypnotism was popular when a person on stage in front of a large audience would attempt to hypnotize everyone in the audience. They were talking about this in a Sunday school class in the 1960s, and one older gentleman spoke up and said, "What will those Catholics think of next!" Mass=large group of people, or Catholic church service, and mass hypnotism has nothing to do with Catholics; it is the hypnotism of a large audience of people. :lol: :lol:
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby crisipicada » Mon Oct 15, 2012 10:58 pm

Son: Mom, why you spank me?

Mom: Son, I spank you because I love you.

Son, slap his mom's face, intensely!

Mom: How dare you, Son, Why you slap me on face? ! ? :!: :?: :!:

Son: Mom, I love you, so much, too! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Nothing can separate us from the love of God
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby Edwin » Tue Oct 16, 2012 11:20 pm

I got some pretty hard whippings from my Dad when I was little with a double leather razer strap! Mom had a small strap, like a light belt that she used and we didn't mind getting whipped from her, but we did not enjoy getting whipped from my Dad. We felt like we might die while he was whipping us. He really hit us hard, not damaging us, but for sure hurting us, stinging! He would tell us two things before, while, or after the whippings. He told us that it was because he loved us that he was giving us those whippings, and he also told us that we should thank the Lord for those whippings. I had a hard time accepting either from him, but he was right. He did it because he loved us, and I can thank the Lord for those whippings. Not everyone feels that way, but I do. He wanted the best for us! :D :D
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby mystic » Wed Oct 17, 2012 11:08 pm

What are the 3 things that let the woman's mood change?

1. I love you!

2. 50% discount

3. You lost weight!
"The real opposite of love is not hate, but indifference" (Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz)
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby Edwin » Thu Oct 18, 2012 2:54 pm

Rightfully, or wrongly Jews have a reputation for pinching the pennies as do people from Scottland. Many Jews went into business for themselves and when you are a business person you have to pinch the pennies, so it is understandable.

I heard this joke in the 1960s. This Jewish lady's health was failing, and she knew that she was going to die within a short period of time. She asked her husband who was also Jewish, "Honey, would you please pay retail for my casket?" :lol: :lol:
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby mystic » Sat Oct 20, 2012 1:07 am

Did you ever notice that the "I am ready in 5 minutes" of a woman and the "I come back in 5 minutes" of a man are..... exactly the same?
"The real opposite of love is not hate, but indifference" (Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz)
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby mystic » Sat Oct 20, 2012 1:11 am

When a couple separates, it is never the fault of one only, but....
of all three of them :)
"The real opposite of love is not hate, but indifference" (Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz)
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Re: JOKER'S CORNER

Postby mystic » Sat Oct 20, 2012 1:24 pm

Today a very very funny thing happened to me. Sometimes (rarely, indeed) I play on a site to see how artificial intelligence evolves. There is an opensource project that created an artificial "God"... and you can actually ask Him (the machine) questions and get answers. The programmers built a memory with something like 40.000 sentences... so it can talk really about anything.

So... to test the chat robot I wanted to find a complicate question that would put it in crisis :lol: How nice I am!!

So, I came up with this question: "How do I tell a girl that I love her?"

Promptly the answer came: "You must persuade me to tell the girl that you love her." :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o

Just to see if the program was giving me the same answer again, I typed the exact same question. This time an unintelligible answer came out. :roll:
"The real opposite of love is not hate, but indifference" (Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz)
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