JOKER'S CORNER

[mystic]

Always dating online:

He: I would like so much to call you. What's your phone number?
She: It's in the white pages.
He: But I do not even know your name.
She: That is on the white pages too.

Another:

He: If I could see you naked, I would die happy.
She: Could be. But if I would see you naked, I would die of laughing.

Another:

She: I love men with brown hair and brown eyes.
He: But I have blue eyes.
She: Exactly.

[Smiley]

This is supposedly a true story:
A school district official was trying to explain Daylight Savings Time to an Indian Chief.The Chief finally shook his head sadly and said "Only a white man would think that you could cut a foot from the bottom of a blanket,sew it on the top of a blanket,and think that you have just made a longer blanket"

[Edwin]

Smiley, that is very interesting, and so true! That is exactly what happens with the time change also! Really when it comes right down to it, nothing is accomplished by going from standard time to day light savings time, and back and forth and back and forth. The time is really the same no matter what you call it!

[Edwin]

Being at the doctor's for that prostate biopsy last Friday made me think of something really funny that happened the last time I was there. That time was not funny for the most part as I went into shock, my blood pressure dropped to 60 over 40, and my pulse rate went down 40 beats, and I was weak, shaking, and cold. The young lady taking care of me felt really sorry for me and did everything she could think of to help me. I just vegitated out laying their enjoying all the attention, but wishing that I was in better condition. It took them 2 hours to get me back to normal functioning. After that was fine. But during that 2 hours something really funny happened. While Carol, my wife, and our granddaughter sat in the waiting room they went in there and tried to get some other woman to come back to see me! I didn't know anything about that until it was all over with, but Carol and our granddaughter sure had a laugh about it, and I think the medical people were highly embarrased for trying to get the wrong woman to come back to comfort me in my low condition!

[red]

My baby girl was asking for more ice cream. I said "find your shoes first i am not going to give more ice cream if you cant find your shoes". Then I again said "get your shoes!" then my older daughter said "mommy I thought i heard you say eat your shoes".

[Edwin]

That was very funny, Red! There was a television show years ago and the name of it was "Kids say the darndest things!" I'm not sure whether it was Art Linkletter as he did things with kids on television. My older brother years ago in the 1960s was giving his son the dickens over a lost hammer, that my brother thought he lost, and my nephew told him that the milk cow ate that hammer! I had the same thing happen with some fencing plyers and our twin daughters. I grilled them about what they did with those fencing plyers until one of them mimicked my voice, raised her voice, and in her broken words, you enough she couldn't talk well yet, said "Where are the pinsing pflyers!" I still have those fencing plyers in my tool tray right here in this room that I am in. That happened probably in 1973!

[red]

The other day there was a police patrol near our house. My eldest daughter asked what is the police doing near our house. I said " oh my, watch out because they are going to get you because you didn't clean up. Here in America there is a law like that". Then she looked worried said " uh oh, guess me and Amber are in trouble" then she ran back to the bathroom.

[Edwin]

Red, you started this Joker's Corner posting, and it has really be a worthwhile one. It is always good to laugh, and you and others have shared some very funny stuff here that make all of us make, chuckle, or belly laugh!

That was really funny what you told your oldest daughter about the police. We had a neighbor who had trouble controling her grandsons, and she used that same tactic, only her's was not that effective. This was in the late 1960s if I remember correctly. She said, "Look, over there at that police officer. If you don't behave he will come over here and get you!" She threatened those kids way too much, and didn't do anything to back up any of her threats, so it was not effective.

We had a little guy at our house a lot while he was growing up. His mother and her friends were forever getting in trouble with the law officers. One time he was in the front seat of the car while I was driving, and he saw lights flashing from a police car. He was just a little, little guy, and he got down on the floor to hide, and said to me, "Hide papa, quick, cops!" He was very serious, and actually I think they told me to hide from cops many times when he was with them! He is, I think 22 years old now, and it hardly seems possible. Seems just like yesterday when he was a baby, and we were changing his diapers!

[red]

It is good to laugh once in awhile, sir Ed. You know exercise our cheek muscles little bit. hehe...at work I have a co worker who is a happy person.I always get along well with her. She likes to share stories and I add on some jokes on it and she laugh out loud. Sometimes I get a laughter here in the house sometimes on movies or tv.

[Edwin]

Yes, Red, it is really good to have people who have a sense of humor! Sometimes we take ourselved too seriously, and we need to learn to laugh at ourselves as well. I really enjoy movies that give a person a reason to laugh. Just in every day life we can find reasons to laugh at things that are really funny.