JOKER'S CORNER

[red]

circumcised? ooppss

[jadegil6]

Maybe she is thinking about size...big or little. Guys with that much muscle usually take steroids to get that way, and they say that taking steroids make a guy's package shrink. But as my friends pappy always used to say, "it's not how long the rope is, it's how you dip the bucket". Just hope that little gal don't burst out laughing in the next comic frame coz as big as he is, he might just pinch her head off.

[mystic]

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[mystic]

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[red]

lol,,,,,but somehow I agree with Sir Michael. It is not the size that matters.

[jadegil6]

Red, It seems as though when you take your husband with you to shop at WalMart, you do the shopping while he wanders around the store trying to find ways to end his boredom. Walmart has asked me to inform you of the following :
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our stores. We cannot tolerate this behavior, and we ask you to keep a closer eye on him, or please leave him at home when you come shopping. Our complaints against him are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. He took 24 boxes of raisins, and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. He set all the alarm clocks in Housewares Department to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. He went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

5. He moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

6. He looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

7. When a clerk asked if they could help him he began rolling on the floor, crying, and he screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. He has been seen darting around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the " Mission Impossible" theme.

9. In the auto department, he practiced his "Madonna look" by using different sizes of funnels.

10. While nervously handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the ammunition and anti-depressants were stored.

11. He hid in a clothing rack, and when people browsed through, he yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

And last, but not least ..
12. Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"

[jadegil6]

A lawyer and a filipina are sitting next to each other on a long flight from Manila to LA. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The filipina just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and visa-versa." Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer, now somewhat agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $50!" figuring that since she is a filipina and he is a lawyer, that he will easily win the match.
This catches the filipina's attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The filipina doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a five-dollar bill and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it's the filipina's turn. She asks the lawyer "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?" The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends E-mails to all his coworkers and friends he knows. All to no avail.
After over an hour, he wakes the filipina and hands her $50. The girl politely takes the $50 and turns away to get back to sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes her and asks, "Well, so what IS the answer!?"
Without a word, she reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.

[mystic]

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[mystic]

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[mystic]

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