Love and money.

[BigBlastGuy]

We could sum it up like this: If aWhat if the husband do not have resources and cannot work because he become ill? Will you wife will stay with your husband?

Of course, I will. When you marry someone because of money then that is not true love. Unless she learns to love the man in the process. Love can be learned and develop in due time. It just needs time and good communication.

I will give you an example, a true story.

My senior, one time share to us about his married life. He married to a woman who has a good work, a stable job here in the City. He has no work yet, but because she accepted him, they get married and have 2 kids. He then landed a job. Therefore, not all women or filipina will marry someone because of money.

Will you love the person who provided you and treat you bad? Being controlling and seems he own you and treated you as what he wants? Married life in not about controlling or treating someone bad. It is about giving and loving, it is about developing intimate relationship, sharing life together, in good times and in bad times. I saw a lot of marriage life that the husband treat his wife badly. He treated her more than servant. Is that love? Of course not. So women, will you love that kind of guy? A western guy who have money but will treat you bad? Who will be controlling, who will not give you freedom to share your heartaches and burdens in life? Who wants to marry someone who wont have a listening heart. Okay okay, you provide resources, money, give good life. But, deep in your heart, he treated you badly.

Of course, I wont marry that kind of guy. If i will be given to choose whom to marry, a westerner who well off and have resources (money) and treat me bad, do not have listening heart, and to choose someone who is not rich and I can help him, whether he is a filipino or not, then i would choose him then. At least I do not have burden in life and can share my heart's desire.

I issue of money and love is not about loving someone because of money or loving someone because of money, but WHO WILL YOU MARRY THAT WILL TREAT YOU WELL, WILL LISTEN TO YOUR HEART'S DESIRE, WHO WILL HELP YOU TO BECOME WHO YOU ARE, WHO WILL SUPPORT YOU EMOTIONALLY, MENTALLY, SPIRITUALLY...

I hope you get my point, bigblastguy.

Crisi, I am not discussing what you do after you marry. I am not discussing your commitment to marriage. I am discussing WHY Filipinas search for western men.

Crisi if given the choice of two men: one man treats you great loves you, you love him, he is very poor and you know you and your children will live in poverty; one man treats you great loves you you love him he has great career and resources and you know you and your children will live in nice home, good, food, money for doctors, education etc, which man do you chose?

Most women will chose the man with resources. To say women don't prefer men with resources and that resources is not a primary reason Filipinas look for a western man is just not being honest.

[BigBlastGuy]

Let me add this basic point about love and money.

Most women (of course there may be some exceptions) no matter their nationality or culture prefer a man with resources to a man in poverty. Given identical men except one is poor the other has resources, most women will prefer the man with resources. The only difference between the men is resources. Obviously and well know across the world and throughout the world over the entire recorded history of mankind women have preferred men with resources.

So to claim that a Filipina, struggling to escape poverty and find a quality western man, does not consciously or subconsciously have resources as a primary factor in her search process is just outlandishly ridiculous. To claim that a Filipina searching for a western man does not have resources as a primary selection criteria defies both the God given nature of men and women and also defies 10,000 years of recorded human history.

[mystic]

Yes, pure love IS action and not feelings. The men who play with women for sex are operating on their feelings, they will say they love her but they only want sex to feel good--that is NOT love. The man who gets out of bed every morning, goes to work at a job he hates (does what does NOT feel good) to provide food clothing and shelter for his wife and children has shown pure love by his action. It is expected that women struggle with their feelings but quality men DO, they take action no matter their feelings.

And your statement that "Men just do nothing and take care a little of the home, all day long" about men in Tibet is blatantly not true.

It is trial to spot out your mistake, because you say contradictions. The sex business is just a money business. It has nothing to do with feelings at all.
Instead, love is only about feelings, nothing to do with actions. Love is an emotional attribute. There can be love without sex, actually.

A man can have a job that he dislikes because he needs food to survive. If he has an unemployed wife, he has to provide the food for her, or he will have legal consequences. Even if he has a dog and leaves it closed in the car for hours under the sun, he will have the same consequences.

About the situation of men in Tibet, since you think you know more than me, please tell me the names of your Tibetan friends and how their family is organized. I can mention a person that I knew, Dr. Lobsang Dolma (MD). She had 4 husbands, practically doing nothing at home. Now she is deceased.

By the way, I am a Platonist. The world is just as your eyes want to see it. You can choose whether love is something holy, mundane, action, or whatever. You will also see the consequences of your choices. I am also a victim of my wrong choices, but the way for me goes toward holiness and the world of ideas rather than the material world. At the end... after you live a material life... what are you left with? It's really not worth. Better to offer/receive the gift of poverty rather than a devoid spiritual life. At the end, the hands of the parents always provide for their children and God sends His Divine Providence.

[BigBlastGuy]

Yes, pure love IS action and not feelings. The men who play with women for sex are operating on their feelings, they will say they love her but they only want sex to feel good--that is NOT love. The man who gets out of bed every morning, goes to work at a job he hates (does what does NOT feel good) to provide food clothing and shelter for his wife and children has shown pure love by his action. It is expected that women struggle with their feelings but quality men DO, they take action no matter their feelings.

And your statement that "Men just do nothing and take care a little of the home, all day long" about men in Tibet is blatantly not true.

It is trial to spot out your mistake, because you say contradictions. The sex business is just a money business. It has nothing to do with feelings at all.
Instead, love is only about feelings, nothing to do with actions. Love is an emotional attribute. There can be love without sex, actually.

A man can have a job that he dislikes because he needs food to survive. If he has an unemployed wife, he has to provide the food for her, or he will have legal consequences. Even if he has a dog and leaves it closed in the car for hours under the sun, he will have the same consequences.

About the situation of men in Tibet, since you think you know more than me, please tell me the names of your Tibetan friends and how their family is organized. I can mention a person that I knew, Dr. Lobsang Dolma (MD). She had 4 husbands, practically doing nothing at home. Now she is deceased.

By the way, I am a Platonist. The world is just as your eyes want to see it. You can choose whether love is something holy, mundane, action, or whatever. You will also see the consequences of your choices. I am also a victim of my wrong choices, but the way for me goes toward holiness and the world of ideas rather than the material world. At the end... after you live a material life... what are you left with? It's really not worth. Better to offer/receive the gift of poverty rather than a devoid spiritual life. At the end, the hands of the parents always provide for their children and God sends His Divine Providence.

No contradictions in my posts. Total consistency. I always said resources (we can say money) are a primary reason filipinas seek western men.

And for your comments on Tibet--there are always exceptions to norms. In every society in the world be it Tibet, Philippines, USA, Britain, France, etc, etc we may find a family where the wife works and has 4 husbands doing nothing, but that is not the norm and to say it is the norm in Tibet is false.

[BigBlastGuy]

"By the way, I am a Platonist. The world is just as your eyes want to see it. You can choose whether love is something holy, mundane, action, or whatever. You will also see the consequences of your choices. I am also a victim of my wrong choices, but the way for me goes toward holiness and the world of ideas rather than the material world. At the end... after you live a material life... what are you left with? It's really not worth. Better to offer/receive the gift of poverty rather than a devoid spiritual life. At the end, the hands of the parents always provide for their children and God sends His Divine Providence."

You may be a Platonist a Sataanist, a Christian or anything else but that has nothing to do with the subject of this tread and what I said.

And your statement "the hands of the parents always provide for their children " is ridiculous and false. Unfortunately many parents do NOT provide for their children, many children are abandoned, sold, neglected and or abused by their parents. The owner of JadeRune is a patron of a Philippines orphanage which is full of children who are NOT being provided for by their parents.

[mystic]

And for your comments on Tibet--there are always exceptions to norms. In every society in the world be it Tibet, Philippines, USA, Britain, France, etc, etc we may find a family where the wife works and has 4 husbands doing nothing, but that is not the norm and to say it is the norm in Tibet is false.

You provided no proof. It is no exception in Tibet. I shook the hand of the Dalai Lama and also know his personal second doctor, Tenzin Cho Dak. He is a very capable doctor, but the Chinese broke his head in two, before he escaped to Darahmshala in India. Despite he recovered, he could not any more cover such high roles, since health could become an issue for him. I studied Tibetan culture for years when I was young. What are your sources?

I should also ask you, what are your sources about filipino culture? Do you live there? Do you have a filipino wife? And don't tell me please that you chatted with this and that, or that the son of the butcher told the baker that filipinas are after money. That's not a proof. In what subject is your degree? What kind of studies did you do? Did you ever make abuse of any substance in your life? How many times did you marry? Do you have a job?
It would help to answer those questions to understand better why you are so sure of your ideas, coz until now what you said didn't make sense.

One of my teachers was used to say: if you don't really have something important to say, better silence. Even silence is part of music.

[mystic]

The owner of JadeRune is a patron of a Philippines orphanage which is full of children who are NOT being provided for by their parents.

Oh, great! So you recognize that God provides through Divine Providence and there is nothing to worry. You are welcome.

[BigBlastGuy]

And for your comments on Tibet--there are always exceptions to norms. In every society in the world be it Tibet, Philippines, USA, Britain, France, etc, etc we may find a family where the wife works and has 4 husbands doing nothing, but that is not the norm and to say it is the norm in Tibet is false.

You provided no proof. It is no exception in Tibet. I shook the hand of the Dalai Lama and also know his personal second doctor, Tenzin Cho Dak. He is a very capable doctor, but the Chinese broke his head in two, before he escaped to Darahmshala in India. Despite he recovered, he could not any more cover such high roles, since health could become an issue for him. I studied Tibetan culture for years when I was young. What are your sources?

I should also ask you, what are your sources about filipino culture? Do you live there? Do you have a filipino wife? And don't tell me please that you chatted with this and that, or that the son of the butcher told the baker that filipinas are after money. That's not a proof. In what subject is your degree? What kind of studies did you do? Did you ever make abuse of any substance in your life? How many times did you marry? Do you have a job?
It would help to answer those questions to understand better why you are so sure of your ideas, coz until now what you said didn't make sense.

One of my teachers was used to say: if you don't really have something important to say, better silence. Even silence is part of music.

(1) Do you need proof the sun rises in the east? There is no society on this earth where the norm is for women to have multiple husbands who sit home and do nothing while she works to support them, not Tibet not anywhere.

(2) A filipina wanting a man with resources is god given human nature which originated long before the Philippines even existed. If you want to question god given human nature maybe you and Dalai Lama discuss it with god.

[BigBlastGuy]

The owner of JadeRune is a patron of a Philippines orphanage which is full of children who are NOT being provided for by their parents.

Oh, great! So you recognize that God provides through Divine Providence and there is nothing to worry. You are welcome.

No I do not "recognize that God provides through Divine Providence and there is nothing to worry". Try telling millions of poor children in this world that there is "nothing to worry" while they die from slow starvation. The issue of poor starving children is one reason Filipinas make resources for their future children a primary consideration when looking for a western husband.

[Edwin]

Love has another aspect to it as well. Love means acceptance. If we love someone we accept them, but if we reject them then we do not love them. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not parish, but have everlasting life." That is true love. Love is very complicated and has many meanings, or shades of meanings. Do we equate love with Hollywood's idea of love? Is love sex. When someone talks about making love, is that really love? Real love is God's love that is brought out in I Corinthians 13: If someone says, "I love you," then they are gone the next week never to be heard from again, is that love? I think there is a love that a husband and wife, or lovers have for each other. There is also brotherly, sisterly, Christian love. There is a love where we love our enemies, where we love those who do not love us, and that is hard! I think we should first strive to love as God loves, and then we will love our husband/wife, girlfriend/boyfriend as we should! We will be loving and caring people.