Moderator: youngj
abufarsi wrote:I have a great friend.
IT is true that we are not as close as we once were, but when our friendship was new and active many years ago, he did some very charitable and understanding things for me.
I moved to the Philippines in the early 90s. I have since moved back to my place. While there with a new wife, a new life, and no personal acquaintances I blundered in many ways socially. Dito was a Filipino man about my age. He was kind enough to see that things I said that were hurtful for Filipinos, were not said with malice. I did not know for example that if I said some aspect of the Philippines could be improved it was an insult to most Filipinos. And yet when I complained about corruption, Christmas being the "begging season", or the drivers... he mostly simply smiled. Sometimes he defended me to his own risk. I for sure would not be offended if somebody said something was wrong with the USA, why, everybody I know here has issues and are not the least bit hesitant to offer solutions either.
I remember my paying the local radio station to run an editorial i had written about the checkpoint I passed gong home. These policemen were accepting cash from my neighbors who were just barely surviving as it was. The response from the police major was to send 5 policemen with rifles to Dito's house, pushed his wife and kids around suggesting that he should talk to his "American friend". Dito still remained my friend and drinking pal. ( it was my last editorial though)
Only when I have learned of Filipino culture more deeply do I see the great sacrifice he was making to be my friend, the depth of his heart, and how much I loved him. Dito is gone now, and it was not until he was gone that I can honestly reflect on the great loss he is to me, his family, and his country.
He never told me what I was doing for him, and thinking back I can't think of anything I did much for him. He simply did not ask much.
Abu
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