Would You Marry Again If You Had the Chance?

[Edwin]

Of the people on the forum we probably have a few from each category. Some are single hoping to find someone available for marriage. Some are married, and are only looking for friendships and activities on the forum, such as posting and responding to other people's posts. Some have been married, and are now single, available to seek marriage. What do you think you would do if you had been married then became available to marry again. My mother was widowed when she was about 55 years old. She joked about finding another man, but she never did, and she lived to be 89 years old. My younger sister was married and divorced three times. Each time she got a man that was a little worse than the last one that she had. Her first husband and the father of her children was the best one, although I am not going to judge her why she did not stay with him. He's not a bad guy, but a little crazy in some ways. He has a personality and ways that rub a lot of people the wrong way. Her second husband was a gay guy who was after boys whenever possible. Her third husband really was crazy out of the mental institution. He had violent tendencies, like cutting up the couch with a butcher knife, and busting up an antique pitcher that was my grandmother's in a fit of rage. He also got my sister in the tub threatening her with the butcher knife, so she figured that was enough, and she seems to be happy with the single life. Carol, my wife, said if any thing ever happens to me before she dies there is no way that she is going to get remarried! She says she is afraid it would be too hard for her to trust someone else, and she is afraid of getting mistreated. Well, if anything ever happens to her before I die, if I can, the Lord willing, I will find someone, because I hate being along!!!!

I am alone temporarily while she and our daughter is on the East Coast, and that is okay. I am surviving.

[red]

No...because its a headache lol besides i have a husband and vowed to love til death and heaven. But when you fight you would think bad but thats temporary...dont make it serious fight. Fight and kiss make up after thats life....no matter what stick to each other love and marriage is working process it isnt instant that its going to be perfect. Stay committed be faithful and loyal God will bless couples who are sticking together through the tides of hardships. I like this motto : family that prays together eat together hehe..

[red]

Im on this forum because its my leisure time. Besides being loyal to jaderune its also because i owe this site bigtime coz its where i found my partner for life.

[Edwin]

I agree with you Red, that when you take the marriage vows they are for life, and it is til death we do part, for better, or worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others will you keep this man/woman unto yourself to be your wedded husband/wife. And if you say I will before God and man you are bound by God's laws to remain committed. The only time a person is free to marry again is after the loss of a spouse in death. If I lost my wife in death I would try to find another, but Carol says that she would not. Everyone has their own ideas about this. My mother joked about remarrying after my Dad died, but she never did. The Pharisees in challenging Jesus talked about Moses allowing a writing of divorcement, but Jesus said that it was because of the hardness of their hearts that it was done, and God was not pleased. Jesus seemed to indicate that if were get married, you are to stay married with that person. The only exception is in the case of adultery according to the way I understand what Jesus said. So, Jesus taught that the person divorcing and remarrying is committing adultery, and that person causes the person they marry to commit adultery also.

[Edwin]

My poor younger sister married and divorced three times. And as I wrote in the other post each husband was a little worse or much worse than the one before! By this time I think she has decided to remain single. But at one time she was wanting someone. I can't remember now whether it was after her last husband or between her second and third. Anyway she was attracted to this one gentleman at church. He was a nice looking man and always sat on the front row at church. I think he was sincere in his walk with God, and a very good person. Anyway, she shared with our mother that she was interested in him. After church one Sunday they went to the grocery store to pick up a few needed items. They were discussing him, and my mother is a fairly loud voice, said, "why, ...........my sister's name, he has false teeth!!!!" As they turned into the next isle they discovered that he was right across the way from them, but they couldn't see him because of the groceries being stacked high. They were both embarrassed!

[red]

If i will have a chance i wont marry again. I am contented of having two girls and i rather devote my life serving the Lord any way i can and fulfill my dream to build houses for my girls and have vast of farms and a business or two when i retire. Send my girls to prestigious university and see them professionals. And have grandkids if i will still be alive by then.

[Edwin]

Yes, Red, plan on still being alive by then! We never know and it is in God's hand, but I plan to live forever. It may not be here on this earth though, but we can plan to be here for a long time. I think sometimes after a person loses a spouse, then when they remarry it is not the same. I know of a couple of people anyway who had great marriages, then their spouses died, and shortly after they married losers. One decided not to do that again, but she does have a good friend that she hangs out with a lot, but I don't think either of them are interested in marriage. He has his kids and grandkids and so does she. The other did not remarry after that bad experience either, but she all had a friend that she ran around with a lot. It mostly depends of the people, who they are, what they are like, and what they want.

[Smiley]

I`m cool with being single for the present time.I have enough friends to keep me far from lonely. That does not mean that I want to be single for the rest of my life.I think everybody sort of needs a witness to their life,someone that they can count on to be truthful and loyal,and someone to return love.

[Edwin]

You are correct, Smiley, in that everyone "needs a witness to their life, someone they can count on to be truthful and loyal, and someone to return love." Everyone has different reasons for what they want and different requirements in their lives. I would not want to be cheated, scammed, or mistreated, but I would not want to be single and alone in the house either. I am alone until about July 10th or so, and I am happy that Carol has the opportunity to do what she is doing, and that train ride is a dream that she has had for many years. I am not extremely thrilled to be here without her, but I am willing to sacrifice so that she can do that, and I am okay. I am pretty busy, so I don't have time to sit around and think about how lonely I am. I will be happy when she returns. I think I am eating better this time that she is gone than I usually do when she is gone. I would not enjoy living the single life. I like to have someone in the house with me, keeping me company!

[crisipicada]

Of the people on the forum we probably have a few from each category. Some are single hoping to find someone available for marriage. Some are married, and are only looking for friendships and activities on the forum, such as posting and responding to other people's posts. Some have been married, and are now single, available to seek marriage. What do you think you would do if you had been married then became available to marry again. My mother was widowed when she was about 55 years old. She joked about finding another man, but she never did, and she lived to be 89 years old. My younger sister was married and divorced three times. Each time she got a man that was a little worse than the last one that she had. Her first husband and the father of her children was the best one, although I am not going to judge her why she did not stay with him. He's not a bad guy, but a little crazy in some ways. He has a personality and ways that rub a lot of people the wrong way. Her second husband was a gay guy who was after boys whenever possible. Her third husband really was crazy out of the mental institution. He had violent tendencies, like cutting up the couch with a butcher knife, and busting up an antique pitcher that was my grandmother's in a fit of rage. He also got my sister in the tub threatening her with the butcher knife, so she figured that was enough, and she seems to be happy with the single life. Carol, my wife, said if any thing ever happens to me before she dies there is no way that she is going to get remarried! She says she is afraid it would be too hard for her to trust someone else, and she is afraid of getting mistreated. Well, if anything ever happens to her before I die, if I can, the Lord willing, I will find someone, because I hate being along!!!!

I am alone temporarily while she and our daughter is on the East Coast, and that is okay. I am surviving.

I understand about your wife Carol said that she wont marry again because she might be mistreated.

I have that fear too, sir. In fact, that is one of the reason why until now I am afraid to settle down. I have heartaches in the past. And the worst thing is that, I do not want that someone would hurt my feelings again. That is why, I reacted to people who is not treating me good because I must admit I am weak and very sensitive and emotional. I have had anxiety, thinking about what if the man that I will marry will beat me, or hit me or yell at me. I do not like that. And also I am afraid when there is fighting.

One of the reasons I need to get our from the house and find a place to live here near at work it is because my elder brothers are fighting and yelling at home. They are so noisy and my heart is so heavy seeing them fighting and yelling to my mother. They have no heart talking to my mother that they are disappointed of having a mother like her. I do not know why but even how bad your mother could be, there is no way we treat them and yell to them. I can say that my mother is a caring mother. If they separated with my father, that is their problem.

Sometimes, I would say, well, it is better to stay single than double trouble. Why? At least being single, you wont worry a lot. While having a bad husband in the future and treat you bad, then that would be a lot of problem.

If God will give me a committed Christian and who is not giving me false hope, and I have peace at heart that he is the one God will give me, and of course the one who will love to go to Church and listen to the word of God, then I would be glad to marry him in God's time. Of course it is my prayer to get married. Hehe.