Give us things to watch for in on line dating

[Edwin]

You know what the monkey said when he got his tail in the lawn mower? "It won't be long now!"

[crisipicada]

When talking to men or women online, it is best to ask questions that will enhance her or his personality. Like, do you go to church? Where do you attend church? Do you have ministry in your local church? Or what is your greatest desire in life? What is your ideal partner in life? Do you wish to have a family in the future? These questions will help you assess the person and you can decide if the person is really sincere with his or her intention online. At this point also you will know his or her thoughts about the matter.

Sometimes, it needs to care about the person so that you can gain his or her love. Do what she or he wants in life, as long as you will know him or her, then you can decide if you are compatible.

[BigBlastGuy]

Forget about "online dating" . You can not date someone unless you can physically spend time with them. Online dating is not real it is an illusion. You can converse with someone online but there is no real online dating. Meet someone, introduce yourself but you are not dating unless you are spending time with that person. People today live in imaginary world of TV and video games. People are real, so must meet them for real. What is next online marriage? Online babies?

[Edwin]

I agree, Crisi, that the kind of questions that are asked is important. Ask questions that draw the person out, and reveal their mode of thinking, and then you can learn a lot about that person. For some of us the questions about church attendance are very important. Finding out the other person's desires in life is important, as well as what they want their partner to be like. Finding out if the person wants to have a family in the future is very important, so that both will have the same desire, and not one does, and the other doesn't!

[mystic]

I found once a site (asawa) with a good list of questions for him and for her. Some look funny to me, but mostly they seem interesting and can help to know a person a little. I will paste them here.

QUESTIONS FOR HER
1. How old are you?
2. What is your native language (Tagalog, Zambal, Visayan, etc.?)
3. Do you consider your English skills, poor, average, or good?
4. If you have a job, what do you do at work? If not, what do you do at home each day?
5. Describe your village or city.
6. Why are your interested in a relationship with a non-Filipino man?
7. Have you had pen pals or boyfriends before who were not Filipino?
8. Why did you break up with your last boyfriend (if any)?
9. How often, for how long and under what circumstances would you wish me to visit the Philippines if we were married?
10. Do you think you have an obligation to support your family in the Philippines financially once we are married?
11. Do you have any health problems?
12. Regarding our budget, who do you think should control it?
13. What is your faith (Catholic, Protestant, etc.?)
14. How often do you attend church?
15. Do you think it matters if husband and wife have very different points of view about religion? If we are of different religious faiths, how will we raise our children?
16. What do you think are a wife’s duties in the house, and what are the husbands, and what duties should they share?
17. Do you prefer a quiet life or an exciting one?
18. Do you like animals? Dogs? Cats?
19. Do you enjoy gambling or the lottery?
20. Do you drink (alcohol)? If so, what and how much?
21. Do you smoke? If so, how often?
22. What games do you enjoy playing, e.g. cards, chess, scrabble, mahjong?
23. Have you had any children? If so, where are they, how old are they and what is your present relationship with their father(s)?
24. Do you like to read the news, books, magazines, or comics? If so, what are your favorites?
25. What music have you listened to recently?
26. What is more important in choosing clothes, comfort or how good they look?
27. Are you a heavy, regular sleeper or do you get up a lot during the night?
28. What do you do for fun?
29. How many brothers and sisters do you have?
30. How do you get along with your brothers and sisters?
31. When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
32. When you were in school, what classes did you like most?
33. What is your greatest triumph or accomplishment?
34. If you could change one event in your past, what would it be?
35. Do you have any role models? Who?
36. What are you the most proud of?
37. What is your greatest fear? Or, what scares you?
38. What makes you angry?
39. What makes you laugh?
40. When you wake up in the morning, are you lazy or full of energy?
41. Do you prefer to live in a house or apartment?
42. Do you want to have a job or career after we are married?
43. Do you want to continue your education after we are married?
44. Describe a perfect husband.
45. Describe a bad husband.
46. What are your hobbies?
47. How long should a man and woman know each other before deciding to get married?
48. How often would you want to call the Philippines long distance if you moved away?
49. What is your greatest fear about marrying a man from another country?
50. Would you prefer to be married in the Philippines or in your future husband’s country?
51. What is your favorite food?
52. Are you quiet or do you like to talk a lot?
53. Tell me about your best friend and what you do together.
54. What is your favorite movie?
55. What is your favorite song?
56. What kind of music do you like?
57. Have you ever been away from your family or home for a long time?
58. Have you traveled alone before?
59. Do you have friends or family in my home country? If so, where do they live, and are you still in contact with them?
60. What was your best subject in school? What was your worst?
61. What year did your graduate from High School?
62. How much older can your husband be than you? For example, if you were 20 years old, is a 35 year old husband too old? 40 years old? 50 years old?
63. Do you care if your new husband has been previously married?
64. If your husband has a former wife and/or children, how often should he talk to them, or be with them?

QUESTIONS FOR HIM
1. What is your height and weight?
2. What is your hair and eye color?
3. Do you drink alcoholic beverages? If yes, which ones and how often?
4. Do you smoke? If yes, how often?
5. Have you ever experimented with illegal drugs?
6. When is your birthday?
7. Have you been married before?
8. Do you have children?
9. If you do have children, how old are they?
10. Are you religious? What is your religion/faith? How religious are you?
11. If you are not Catholic, will you respect my right to attend Catholic services? How will our children be raised??
12. Do you want children in our marriage? How many?
13. Do you want me to work? If I want to work, will you allow me to?
14. Will we be able to send a monthly allowance to my family in the Philippines if I want to help them?
15. Have you ever been arrested? If yes, explain.
16. What are your favorite hobbies?
17. Do you like sports? Which ones?
18. Are you healthy? If you have any health problems, what are they?
19. What is the weather like where you live?
20. Do you live close to your family (parents, brothers and sisters, etc.?
21. How many brothers and sisters do you have?
22. Will your family support an intercultural marriage?
23. Do you have any connections to former wives or girlfriends? Why?
24. What kind of movies do you like?
25. What kind of music do you like?
26. Who are your favorite actors and actresses?
27. Who are your favorite singers/songs?
28. Do you own your house, or have an apartment?
29. How long have you had your job?
30. What is your job title, and what do you do?
31. Have you been in this job long?
32. Are you planning to change jobs soon?
33. What other jobs have you had?
34. What are your career ambitions?
35. Do you have a retirement plan?
36. How much debt do you have?
37. Do you have a college education? If so, what was your major?
38. Why are you interested in a Filipina wife instead of a woman from your own country?
39. What do you know about the Philippines? Have you ever been here?
40. Do you know any other Filipinos? If yes, what do you think of them?
41. Describe to me what you think are a wife’s responsibilities in a marriage.
42. Describe to me what you think are a husband’s responsibilities in a marriage.
43. How often would you want to revisit the Philippines after we marry? Once a year, once every five years, etc.?
44. What kind of food do you like?
45. Where have you traveled in the world? In your own country?
46. Would you want or allow me to continue my education in your country?
47. In your opinion, how long should a man and a woman know each other before considering marriage? What is the shortest possible time?
48. Do you prefer marriage in the Philippines or in your country?
49. Do you prefer a religious ceremony or civil?
50. Tell me about the things you do best and are most proud of.
51. Tell me about the things you do worst, and what you are doing to improve on those things.
52. Do you think there should be secrets between a husband and wife? If so, when?
53. Is it ever allowable for a husband to physically attack his wife? If he does, do you think should she call the Police and report him? Explain.
54. Do you want a pre-nuptial agreement?
55. Describe your idea of a perfect summer vacation.
56. Describe a perfect weekend.
57. What kind of clothes do you like to wear?
58. Do you have pets? If yes, what kind?
59. How often, and for how long, do you think I should talk to my family on the telephone from your country, long-distance?
60. Are there many Filipinos where we will live?
61. Have you ever been in a fight? If yes, describe it.
62. What kind of car do you drive?
63. Do you consider yourself talkative or quiet?

[Smiley]

Forget about "online dating" . You can not date someone unless you can physically spend time with them. Online dating is not real it is an illusion. You can converse with someone online but there is no real online dating. Meet someone, introduce yourself but you are not dating unless you are spending time with that person. People today live in imaginary world of TV and video games. People are real, so must meet them for real. What is next online marriage? Online babies?

I`m somewhat inclined to agree there BBG. It`s one thing to communicate online but to call it dating is a bit of a stretch.When you spend time with someone you can do everyday things together and get a feel for how well the two of you mesh.Little things like tone of voice and physical reaction to stimuli around us can tell a lot about who we really are.Email can be edited to look good but by then it has lost the personality of the author.Some people might indulge in it,and some may be successful but I would never consider the relationship as bona fide without some quality time together.

[Edwin]

Wow! mystic, what an impressive list of questions. They cover all the angles! Are we willing to answer those questions honestly? Then that would give other people a pretty good idea of what we are like and what we want. Technology has advanced so much in the last few years that a person can get an idea about what someone else is like using that technology. At one time it was a long process just to get a letter sent from one place to another, and then hope it would get there. Then telegraphing came in. Then the mail got a little more reliable and faster. Then the computer age came in when we could send emails to people. Chat came in, and people chatted with other people who had common interests on certain subjects. Then video chat came as well as people being able to talk on the telephones. I know we have this ongoing argument whether a person can date using the internet or not. I think a person can get a pretty good idea about what people are like using the internet. Then there comes a time when they must meet face to face to get a better idea. So I think modern technology is wonderful for helping people to connect with other people who have similar interests. Whether you want to call it online dating or not, the key thing is to watch!

[wayne208]

Those are some good Questions .. I could answer them all easily .. I Think .. Yes Crisi & Edwin I also Have a Great Mother .. From Her I get My Love Of God From My Father a Great Guy who has since Passed on .. From My Dad I got Strength and a Love of Cars .. Both of My Parents Told Me to respect Ladies .. I sometimes Think That Ladies are More Loving of God then Most Men .. Sorry Guys But I do Believe that .. I could not Marry a Lady who did Not Have God and Love in Her heart ..