by Gary2310 » Wed Nov 28, 2012 8:50 pm
I think that it is wishful to believe that all people actually think about love and marriage in much the same way. In reality, however, this just is not the way it is. Love and marriage have somewhat different meanings to different people.
I don't think love relationships are ever simple, and that's because the human dimension is very complex. The way we think about such things as love and marriage is greatly influenced by our experiences in life and by the culture that we are part of. And so, it can be difficult to find that very special someone you are meant to be with...Someone that you are compatible with in ways that will truly bond both of you [happily] for a lifetime.
It's been said "marriage takes work"...Or, "couples need to work at being couples". Maybe it's a novel idea that I have, but I don't feel that you should have to "work at" living with the one you truly love. Raising a family...Yes, that's takes work...Earning a living to support your family...Absolutely, that's takes plenty of work. But, living with the one you truly love, that shouldn't take work. I believe if you have to work at being married, then you will eventually get tired...Just like when you have to work doing anything else, after a while you get tired. Being tired in a marriage means an end to marriage. Even if the marriage continues to exist legally, the meaningful part of the marriage is dead. Yes, people are dynamic...Life is dynamic. But, if you love someone. Wait, not just love, but DEEPLY love someone [I'm talking about the kind of love that awakens the soul], then that person becomes a #1 priority in your life. And, their health and happiness is the most important thing in your life. But, not because it takes work, but rather because it becomes a natural instinctual desire, something that gives you joy and happiness, and not fatigue.
It's been said here by others that friendship is fundamental to having a loving and lifelong marriage. I believe this as well. I believe friendship is the basis of mutual feelings that develop over time. And, at least for me, there has to be a physical attraction. I believe that a healthy physical connection is very important in a relationship. In my opinion, not having that connection frustrates the very essence of what God intended for man and woman. And, I'm not talking strictly about procreation. I believe that God intended man and woman to love, in the physical sense, beyond procreation, and to connect on a level reaching the soul, on a level where the mind and the body, and the soul merge. Without physical love, the body connection is not there, making a true the connection of the mind and soul unlikely.