mystic wrote:There is one thing that I learned a little through this forum (thanks Crisi) and a little through other means. Do you remember the story of Cinderella? Only she fit in the small shoes. That was the figurative "shape" of her love.
Crisi wrote, we must keep standards, i.e. we have to evaluate a person through a set of rules or requirements, which represent how our ideal half is. Only one person has to fit in the shoes. If there are many, and our standards are low, we are likely to choose the wrong person and find problems.
So, love somehow should not be blind. We are taking a choice that will affect us, our children and our environment for the rest of our lives. So it is good to know what we want, i.e. have an ideal image of our beloved half. Then, it is only matter to make it true.
In my idea, the first and most important is that she is God-fearing. If she is so, she won't go against God's law and will have good values.
When we try to see the person as he or she is, there is really a big tendency that we will be frustrated or disappointed. I have experience that. As human being, we always have failures. As long as we mature in the long run, we begin to understand things.
For me, I try my best to trust the Lord. I believe that "Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith", is important for us to apply. It means that, when someone fail, or because all people fails, there is someone who wont fail us, and that is Jesus. He will never fail us nor forsake us.
The next time, we are hurt, we try to blame other people of out failure in life, and the other people do the same way and he or she blames others, it is important to take maturity of our life. That is to keep on living a life that we wont blame others. I know, it would be hard, but it can be applied.
The good thing for people who are mature in his or Christian life is that, he or she knows how to respond life.
Have you found someone, wherein, even when you are in disagreement or bad situation in a relationship, still you want to stay with him or her? That is the difference being being in love and being loving. Being in love is something you feel to someone and it has the tendency to fail. But being loving is much better. It means, despite for everything happens, you remain being loving.
Well, to be honest, I really try to be loving, because we Christian must be loving.