No Children

[Davey]

What is a Filipina opinion? What about an American man that has many desirable characteristics: mature, attractive, kind, intelligent, romantic, well educated, hard working, financially secure, one-woman man, wanted to live in the Philippines, but he does not want to have children. He might embrace a child a Filipina already has, but he does not want to create children. How will Filipinas on JadeRune respond to this man? He is obviously honest because he tells this up-front.

[janeithv]

Well, for me the package is real desirable: mature, attractive, kind, intelligent, romantic, well educated, hard working, financially secure, one-woman man. Wanted to live in the Philippines??? It doesn't matter but does not want to have children? My big question is why?

Well, at least your honest and up front, the woman knows what she will get into and that's a good start. I'm pretty sure there will be girls out there who will jump at you... just be careful and spend time to really know whom you will be living a life with.

Janeith

[red]

If I were single I would certainly ask same question " why not have children?" Back when i was searching here one of the important questions I asked to the guys is "do you like kids? do you want to have children?" If the answer is no.Then i stop communicating the guy. In dating sites it's like business deal. Give time to work out getting to know each other well...make sure to feel in love before hooking up with someone.

[janeithv]

Sometimes, you think your in love or maybe fall in love with the idea of love, hook with someone... chatting and emailing daily, once a week phone call plus snail mails twice a month and telling secrets...

At the end, you get disillusion that there were secrets that matters that is kept from you.

Falling in love, get married, have children ( not necessarily in the same order) is very important to me. Why stay with someone who cant give you kids when what he offers, you get from others without tying your life to him? Just a thought....

Well, I'm in my late 30's and the possibility of not having my own kids is looming so I might changing my mind anytime

[Edwin]

Honesty and trust is important so that you know what you are getting into. Then being able to trust that the person is genuine so that he or she can be trusted is a plus. People who trust in God in their daily lives should make them trust worthy. A person who genuinely loves God should not want to hurt any other person.

[Davey]

I have respect for each person's right to make decisions for their own life as long as they do no harm to someone else. What I say is not intended to belittle another's opinion who may differ.

A general observation: There are already millions of poor unwanted, neglected children in the world, many in the Philippines. Bringing more children into the world when there are millions starving and in need of a good parent and good home seems unreasonable. A selfish act. Women may have a biological urge to have a child but does that make it right to have a child? A man has a biological urge to have sex with many women, but society condems this; so logically it follows that just because a woman has a biological urge to have a child does not mean she should. As I said, there are millions of children already (many in the Philippines) who need a home, need a mother, need love. Why not care for, raise and love one of these needy children? Or provide support and necessities to these children. Has not God given us freewill above the animals--an animal can only follow it's biological instinct, but God has given people the ability to see beyond our own base needs.

As for me, I can honestly say, I have worked and sacrificed much to succeed, I have lived in several countries, I have always been sought out by women so I would not go to the Philippines because I need to find someone, I would go to achieve a certain type and quality of life. I would offer much. But we all must live with our conscience. How could I live with myself if I willingly brought more children into this world (who of course I would provide well for) while I watched children in the community around me suffered without the necessities of life?

[tom]

being curious, i did a little "power search" research at the christian-filipina website:

at that site there are listed more than 17,000 profiles of filipinas ...

of those, 10,778 are ages 18 to 30.... for the question "want children?": 75 of the 18 to 30 year-olds answered "no"... 359 answered "not sure"... and 2,741 answered "yes".... (7,603 of the 18 to 30 year-olds did not answer that question)...

3,667 of the 17,000 filipinas are ages 31 to 40.... 37 answered "no".... 218 answered "not sure".... and 956 answered "yes".... (2,456 did not answer the question)....

1,736 are ages 41 to 50.... 149 "no"... 207 "not sure"... 211 "yes"... (1,169 no answer)...

689 are ages 51 to 79... 168 "no"... 32 "not sure"... 40 "yes"... (449 no answer)...

the point is: it might not be easy to find a young filipina who does not want to have children.... but, it isn't impossible...

[Edwin]

When Carol and her brother were little and they were eating their supper, they would have something on their plates they didn't want to eat. They were told "don't you know there are people starving in China?" Carol's brother replied, "Why don't you box up mine and send my food that I don't want to eat to them?" He is now living in that part of the world.

When Carol was 18 or 19 years old she was working in orphanages under missionary status in Alaska. They were sent things that were not fit to use including used tea bags. I wouldn't have imagined that such a thing would happen, but it did.

[red]

Here's an illustration. Before i met my husband he told me that he was not planning on having children again. But when we met his mind changed. We made an agreement that we have to meet first and date in person. We dated and got engaged..and he got me pregnant and we got married.

[HappyDave]

but he does not want to have children

Just get a Vasectomy and let it stand that you **can't** have children. Moot point then.

Dave