Can you help me some advice....?

[Hannahmarie]

Hi everybody....
i have a foreign Bf,and i am afraid if he leave me someday..
i never ask him something but he offered to give me..

i want him to be Happy and not leave me because i really
love him very much!

what can i do to make more happiness for him?

[crisipicada]

It is a lot of struggle while waiting for someone you love and i have experienced that before and sometimes you loose hope if he is really coming and sometimes you do not believe anymore. One thing i learn is to give your heart to the Lord and pray for that person that God will make a way the give you a true love while waiting for him. Love is giving and it is normal for someone to give you something because he wants you to feel that he is there and always ready to help you. Pray to the Lord that he will direct you in your relationship. One thing i can say is to trust God than man. Make sure God is glorify in your relationship. If there is something that God is not please to your relationship, it is one of the hindrances that you wont be happy. Of course give time to talk all the time. Give time to chat, give time to send email and let him know what you are doing and what you desire in your future. Tell him that you are looking forward for your togetherness and want to have commitment in that relationship that you have. Tell him that you are happy to talk to him and always thinking of him and him alone. Do not make any reason that will destroy your relationship. If there is any, you have the reason why and you can tell him why. Always remember, communication, honesty and faithfulness are important in a relationship.

Lastly, you must always seek guidance from the Lord through Bible reading and prayer. You must pray to give you direction and guidance in all your decision you will make. Give your heart to the Lord and pray that God will search your heart and give you true love, a love that is committed and Godly. Remember, having a partner in life is a major decision in life. Proverbs says, "For I give you good doctrine/instruction, forsake ye not my law". God give us teachers, parents, sisters and brothers, to ask for guidance. If their instruction do not contradict God's wisdom, learn from them. Learning God's wisdom is better than learning from others bad experiences. Why? Because it will free you from great destruction. Hope it help.

[Manilaman]

Hi everybody....
i have a foreign Bf,and i am afraid if he leave me someday..
i never ask him something but he offered to give me..

i want him to be Happy and not leave me because i really
love him very much!

what can i do to make more happiness for him?

Believe what a person does not what they say.

Tell him nicely that you are have positive feelings for him and want to see your relationship move forward which means that you expect he will visit you in the Philippines within the next 6 months and then, if you mutually agree to marry, you will be married with the next 6 to 12 months.

If you are both in agreement, you will both work to make this happen. If either of you is not in agreement you will not work hard to make this happen, it will not happen, your relationship with this man should be ended so you can both move on with your lives.

Hope is an emotion. Women like to feel, to be emotional, that is why they need a man who is more action oriented, a man who will take positive action. If the is man does not take positive action then you should cut him loose and move on with your life.

[crisipicada]

it is true. Thanks for this comment. One thing women wants is the man who will be there for him. of course the woman will also make sure that he will be faithful but it is seldom. But both women and men are not serious at all. I pray to find a true one.

[Manilaman]

it is true. Thanks for this comment. One thing women wants is the man who will be there for him. of course the woman will also make sure that he will be faithful but it is seldom. But both women and men are not serious at all. I pray to find a true one.

"he will be faithful but it is seldom"

Not fair to be slamming just men for messing around. For every 1 man messing around there is 1 woman with him. In the Philippines since there is no divorce it is common for married Filipino men who have enough money to have a girlfriend on the side, but that girlfriend surely knows he is married. So Filipnas, stop blaming men. Your sister Filipinas are just as guilty as they are knowingly sleeping with married men.

And when a young filipina is married to a much older western man a large percentage of those filipias are getting action on the side.

Philippine society hides under the veneer of morality as they are 80% catholic and talk a good line but truth is Filipinos are very earth people and there is a whole lot of shaking going on in the Philippines!

[Edwin]

it is true. Thanks for this comment. One thing women wants is the man who will be there for him. of course the woman will also make sure that he will be faithful but it is seldom. But both women and men are not serious at all. I pray to find a true one.

That is the ideal, Crisi, is for the the man and the woman to be true to each other. We have to each one of us purpose in our hearts to do what is right, and right it is to be faithful and true. I pray that God will give you one that is faithful and true to you!

[crisipicada]

it is true. Thanks for this comment. One thing women wants is the man who will be there for him. of course the woman will also make sure that he will be faithful but it is seldom. But both women and men are not serious at all. I pray to find a true one.

"he will be faithful but it is seldom"

Not fair to be slamming just men for messing around. For every 1 man messing around there is 1 woman with him. In the Philippines since there is no divorce it is common for married Filipino men who have enough money to have a girlfriend on the side, but that girlfriend surely knows he is married. So Filipnas, stop blaming men. Your sister Filipinas are just as guilty as they are knowingly sleeping with married men.

And when a young filipina is married to a much older western man a large percentage of those filipias are getting action on the side.

Philippine society hides under the veneer of morality as they are 80% catholic and talk a good line but truth is Filipinos are very earth people and there is a whole lot of shaking going on in the Philippines!

Now that you know so do not be like other man who is not faithful because it hurts, and if the woman is serious with you then give time to know each other and respect her culture like visiting the house of a filipina so that she will introduce you to her family. And also do not advise your filipina gf if you will have one that you will meet at a certain place without the knowledge of her parents of family because it is not good. Not because we she is already adult and can make decision her own but in the end who will she run to if she gets hurt? Of course the family. So sad to hear that my chief said that his cousin who has white bf only want to meet her in the Philippines just for sex. and that is not good. because you must respect her also and tell the parents that you have good intention with her. After all it makes her heart happy that you are willing to meet her family. Any concern you want to discuss then discuss it. So that she also will be enlightened.

[Edwin]

it is true. Thanks for this comment. One thing women wants is the man who will be there for him. of course the woman will also make sure that he will be faithful but it is seldom. But both women and men are not serious at all. I pray to find a true one.

"he will be faithful but it is seldom"

Not fair to be slamming just men for messing around. For every 1 man messing around there is 1 woman with him. In the Philippines since there is no divorce it is common for married Filipino men who have enough money to have a girlfriend on the side, but that girlfriend surely knows he is married. So Filipnas, stop blaming men. Your sister Filipinas are just as guilty as they are knowingly sleeping with married men.

And when a young filipina is married to a much older western man a large percentage of those filipias are getting action on the side.

Philippine society hides under the veneer of morality as they are 80% catholic and talk a good line but truth is Filipinos are very earth people and there is a whole lot of shaking going on in the Philippines!

Now that you know so do not be like other man who is not faithful because it hurts, and if the woman is serious with you then give time to know each other and respect her culture like visiting the house of a filipina so that she will introduce you to her family. And also do not advise your filipina gf if you will have one that you will meet at a certain place without the knowledge of her parents of family because it is not good. Not because we she is already adult and can make decision her own but in the end who will she run to if she gets hurt? Of course the family. So sad to hear that my chief said that his cousin who has white bf only want to meet her in the Philippines just for sex. and that is not good. because you must respect her also and tell the parents that you have good intention with her. After all it makes her heart happy that you are willing to meet her family. Any concern you want to discuss then discuss it. So that she also will be enlightened.

Crisi, that is excellent advice! Keep everything above board, honest, and upright, with the blessing of the family!

[Manilaman]

""Now that you know so do not be like other man who is not faithful because it hurts, and if the woman is serious with you then give time to know each other and respect her culture like visiting the house of a filipina so that she will introduce you to her family. And also do not advise your filipina gf if you will have one that you will meet at a certain place without the knowledge of her parents of family because it is not good. Not because we she is already adult and can make decision her own but in the end who will she run to if she gets hurt? Of course the family. So sad to hear that my chief said that his cousin who has white bf only want to meet her in the Philippines just for sex. and that is not good. because you must respect her also and tell the parents that you have good intention with her. After all it makes her heart happy that you are willing to meet her family. Any concern you want to discuss then discuss it. So that she also will be enlightened.""

Crisi, I have lived in several different countries and cultures. Seems each culture thinks their values are best and expect everyone to adapt their way. So if a respect their right to live as they chose then they should show me the same courtesy and respect my right to live the way i chose.

If I want to meet a filipina somewhere, that is between she and, I have zero interest in whether her family likes it or not. My interactions with any woman, filipina or western, are honest. If i want to meet her, talk to her, walk with her, sleep with her, live with her, marry her, divorce her that is between the woman and I. I respect her enough to let her make her own decisions based on her unique family, cultural, moral values. My interaction is with her not her family. Any man that wants to base his interaction with a woman on what her family or priest or culture wants is going to have a long list of people to consult! I make my own decision, she makes her decision. If we agree good. If we do not agree we go our separate ways. If a filipina insists on her family and cultural values, she should find a Filipino man.

[Edwin]

Actually the truth is that there are many foreigners, as the people from the Philippines refer to anyone not from their country, who love Philippine culture. We have lost something in our culture that the people from the Philippines have not lost. They still love and respect family. They take care of their own, and I think that is admirable, even if they do need to enlist a little help to get that done. If we see someone in need, we are supposed to help them if we are able to do that.

There is a quote, and I can't remember who said it, but it goes like this: "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose!" Do you believe that? You better! I believe it with all my heart!

I talked about our friend aligning himself with his filipina wife's families, but also my brother-in-law is another example. He was quite successful in his life, and has enough for his retirement to be very comfortable. He married a filipina about 10 years ago. He completely immersed himself in the culture of the Philippines, and he is very happy. He has lived in the Philippines those 10 years. He said himself that he has made his filipina a very rich woman. He is well aware that he does not own the very nice house, and the second house he built as well, and the nice large swiming pool. He has his property, or her property as a beautiful garden with all kinds of fruit trees. He has set up solar electricity. I have never seen it, only pictures, but my wife has been there, and stayed there almost 2 weeks. He has done all of the things the foreigners do for their filipina wives. He put some of that family through college. He employs one from that family. He has set some of them up in business. He taught one of the relatives how to make delecious pie crusts, and that gave her business a boost, making people want to buy her pies. He is not crying about losing all his money to his filipina families, but he loves them and they love him. That is his life. He is 71 years old, and I think he wants to live forever he is so happy. So the foreigners have to decide what they want. I am not in a position to need to find someone because I am married, but if I did need to find someone, I would be very happy to find a nice filipina, and though I am not as well off as my brother-in-law I would spend every penny I could get my hands on to make her and her family happy. I love their culture, and I love it that they are God loving, and God fearing. I love it that their families stick together. We have lost that in our culture. I think they have real value, and the foreigner takes on real value when he hooks up with one of them. It is not their loss, but their gain! That is my opinion.