JOKER'S CORNER

[Edwin]

It is interesting to me about weight and the way people view it. Some are offended at being characterized as being over weight, or fat, but my wife tells he there are nicer ways to describe a person rather than saying they are fat. They are heavy or they are over weight, and you probably know more of the weight descriptions than I do.

Our daughter's sister-in-law is here, and she is obese by any standards, but she has a wonderful attitude, and I don't think she is easily offended, because she laughed and thought it was funny when our daughter repeated something that she was told, which is:

"A moment on the lips is forever on the hips." I had never heard it described that way before!

[tom]

Share your jokes here...all kinds of joke...

teacher:"good morning students."

students:"good morning teacher"

teacher:"can anyone tell me WHY you must NEVER do your math homework at the zoo in the lion's cage?"

student: "because whenever you add 4 plus 4, you get ate"

*******************************************************************************************************************

teacher: "good morning students... today we will begin by reviewing our chemistry lessons from yesterday.... can anyone please tell me the chemical formula for water?"

student: "yes, the chemical formula for water is: "H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O"..."

teacher: "what?!?... no, that is not correct... where did you ever get such a silly and incorrect idea?"

student: "from you... yesterday you told us the chemical formula for water is H to O"

I agree. Seems like a few people just talking to themselves.

those are funny jokes, tom...

[Edwin]

Very funny indeed!

[jadegil6]

These answers are from 7 and 8 year old kids:

(1)What would make your Mom perfect?
She's already perfect on the inside. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery
(2) If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?
She has this weird rule about keeping my room clean. I'd change that.
I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it, and not me.
I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
(3) Why did God make Mothers?
Mostly to clean the house.
To help us to get out of there when we were born.
(4) How did God make Mothers?
He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
(5)Why did God give you your Mother and not some other Mom?
Because we're related.
God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's Moms like me.
(6) What kind of a little girl was your Mom?
I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
They say she used to be nice.
(7) What did Mom need to know about your Dad before she married him?
His last name.
She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
Does he make at least $8000 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
(8) Why did your Mom marry your Dad?
My Dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom likes to eat a lot.
She got too old to do anything else.
My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
(9) Who's the boss at your house?
Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because Dad's such an idiot.
Mom. You can tell by her room inspections. She sees the stuff under the bed.
I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than Dad.
(10) What's the difference between Moms and Dads?
Moms work at work and work at home, and Dads just go to work at work.
Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
Dads are taller and stronger, but Moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want something.

[Edwin]

There is a church song entitled "The Cross I Bear." This little Sunday School child came home after church, and the parents asked what they sang at church. He told them that they sang about the cross-eyed bear!

[crisipicada]

Job Interview.

Employer: What can you contribute to our company?

Applicant: Oh?????, we have contribution sir?

[crisipicada]

Teacher: use DOES and AMONG in a sentence...

PEdro: AMONG birds, only Parot DOES the talking.

Teacher: Very good! How about you, Juan????

Juan: when the kabaw(carabao) DOESmag the tree, naapilAMONG lubi!

......

[Edwin]

There is a lot of great information in this Joker's Corner!

[crisipicada]

Inday: Father, I confess, every time I look at other women during mass, I realize I'm the prettiest girl in the church! Is that a sin?

Priest: No, Inday, it's a joke.

[Edwin]

Inday: Father, I confess, every time I look at other women during mass, I realize I'm the prettiest girl in the church! Is that a sin?

Priest: No, Inday, it's a joke.

That's a good one, Crisi!