Death

[Edwin]

Death seems to have visited our family far too often here lately, and I hope that it stops for a while. First Carol and her brother's step sister, actually their first cousin, but they were raised in the same family, so they considered themselves brother and sisters. Anyway the step sister died, when Carol's brother was her seeing doctors about his cancer. He elected not to attend her funeral because he knew that he was dying, and he couldn't bring himself to attend her funeral, so he didn't. He returned to the Philippines, and then about 4 months later he died, which was just about 3 weeks ago I think. I had a nephew who was married to a filipina from the Philippines. He brought her to the USA, had 2 lovely children with her, and she divorced him. He was in contact with his kids ever since. His son is a fully grown very young man, and his daughter I think is about 16 years old or so. He returned to the Philippines and married a young filipina. They built a house beside her parents' house, and he had been living in the Philippines with her ever since, except for very short periods of time that he would come to the USA, spend a few weeks, then return to her in the Philipppines. He has been married to her and living in the Philippines for several years now. He just came to the USA a short time ago, after I called him, and talked with him while he was still in the Philippines. My sister just called this morning, and told us that around 6 a.m., he died of cardiac arrest. We are pretty sad, and I can't even imagine the loss that his filipina wife and her family must be feeling right now. Please help me pray for them. He lived there in Bonuan Binloc, Dagupan City, and that is where they live also, right there by the sea. Please pray that the Lord will help them as I am sure they are deeply distraught and grieving losing him. I just talked with my sister about him late last night, and she told me about communications with them that tells me that she was working on a visa to try to come to the USA with him, which also is very sad, as I am sure she had her hopes and dreams high. Thank you so much!

[Edwin]

This is sad for a number of reasons. He was a guy who had a hard time in life. It seemed like things were better, but then for him, his life was up and down. He battled with feelings of disturbance and agitation. He took medication to try to keep him evened out, and if he didn't take it, which often he didn't he would feel extremely disturbed. Some maybe would be critical of him, and judge him harshly, but God is the judge, and He does all things right, even though if is hard sometimes for us to accept that in our finite reasoning. He was a week or less younger than our twins. My sister came home once and announced to everyone that she was pregnant with him. Carol didn't even know that she was pregnant with the twins, and when my sister found out, I don't think she was really happy, because she felt like Carol was stealing her thunder! There is another one of those terms that not everyone understands. It simply means that, my sister thought she had the glory, and then Carol stole it, revealing she was pregnant with twins. Well, when they were little they were like triplets, being cousins, and together, the same age, tottling around, they seemed like triplets. We are pretty sad also because he was 41 going on 42 years old, and it doesn't seem like anyone should die that young. He has a wife in the Philippines who was counting on a future with him, and that makes it very sad also, and now I'm sure she is feeling like her dreams are destroyed! So, I am praying and feeling really badly, and all of us are grieving the loss.

[red]

Honestly, this is the topic that scares me because I am not ready that any of my family members (siblings, parents etc) be vanished on this world. God blessed me more time to be with them. And them to have long long years be together one another. Life is so good when love ones are complete and happy despite the poverty. Good health and togetherness, happiness is all that matters, Lord.

If death occurs like non stop in the family, we have this belief here like breaking a glass on the grave during interment of the loved one. Like when my late grandmother died my Auntie broke a glass plate on top of coffin during the interment.

[Smiley]

I know that feeling far too well. I have buried a lot of friends and family. We don`t know when our time is up. We should act accordingly.
Years ago I was squadron electrician of the west cost minesweepers.We had just come in from a patrol in the Queen Charlotte Islands. I was looking forward to a salmon fishing trip with a buddy. I showed up at his place to see police tape all over the place, the night before he had blown the top of his head off with a Lee Enfield 303. I could never figure out why. Instead i spent my weekend cleaning the blood and stuff out of his kitchen(thats where he did it).If I didn`t do it his mother would have had to and there was no way that I would ever make her go through that.
I have seen a lot of death and more gore than I ever wanted to but that one experience seems to stand out in my mind.

[Edwin]

Red, I have never heard about breaking the glass at the interment. That is very interesting, and maybe it does break the chain of death, huh? Yes, Smiley, suicide is very sad. They are going to perform an autopsy on him to learn the actual cause of death. My sister told me that last evening he was on the floor holding his stomach. His daughter wanted to call an ambulance, or wanted to take him in, like to the hospital, but he refused. He called my sister. They are divorced for many years, but they are good friends. My sister told him to go to bed, and when he would awake in the morning then see that he got help. Well, I always want to fix things, but this can't be fixed as he is now dead. My sister said there is no going back to do it better or right, because it is done, and we don't know for sure what caused his death yet.

Smiley, we have had too many suicides in our family. My great grandfather, father of my grandmother shot himself and died a few days later in the hospital in Portland, Oregon. His son, my great uncle, and my Dad's favorite uncle did the same, only his was more messy and damaging. He destroyed himself and the ceiling above him. It was quite traumatic and sad. His son wanted to do the same thing, but he was in a wheel chair, and his wife would not let him do that, which was a blessing. My younger brother, just 2 years younger than I did the same thing, and it has hurt us in our family ever since. My mother had a dream and finally got peace after many years of grieving. She thinks he found peace at the end, and I hope and pray that is true. I still miss him after 44 years since the incident. All of us need the Lord to keep us in peace as we live. Jesus in John 14:27; "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." 14:1;"Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me. 2; In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. 3; And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also. 4; and whither I go ye know, and the way ye know."

[Smiley]

Yeah,after cleaning my buddies blood and stuff off the ceiling I had to patch it. The bullet went into the apartment above and was absorbed in a couch.
My Great-grandfathet(my fathers mothers dad) tried to hang himself in the barn but somehow came through with a broken ankle. Not really sure of the details,it happened well before I was born.He was involved in one of the most famous Canadian murder legends ever. It was an Irish feud that had followed them to Canada. In 1880 several households of the one family were massacred in one night.

[red]

Yes Sir Ed, breaking a glass plate during interment will break the chain of death in the family. Won't hurt to try.

[Smiley]

I had a great aunt that was very superstitious. She would have some little ritual for every situation. It got to the point that almost everything she saw was either an omen of good luck or bad luck,depending on her mood of the day I suppose. I was about 7 or 8 at a funeral and it started to rain. Of course Aunt Mary stated with great authority that rain hitting the coffin was a precursor of bad luck. Being a kid,I innocently asked "For Who?". A lot of people laughed. Then I asked if laughing at a funeral was good luck or bad luck. Got my ass whipped good that night, It was worth it.

[red]

good for you! you best shut up and let the old folks do their thing..

[Edwin]

Yes, Red, wouldn't hurt to break that glass on the coffin. Yes, Smiley, Carol and I were in the house where my great uncle shot himself. I think he used a high powered rifle, because it also destroyed the ceiling. My cousin-in-law pointed to the patched ceiling, and it just about freaked my wife, Carol out as those kinds of things bother her a great deal. I know what you are saying, Smiley, because before my uncle's funeral, my older brother-in-law gave me a speech about how I was not to smile or laugh at the funeral. I just didn't understand that at all. You mean we have to go somewhere, where we can't smile or laugh!